An introduction to hardcore French songs for kids! Are you ready?
You thought “London bridge” is not a very sweet song to sing to kids? You thought the one about a man who bumped his head and couldn’t get up in the morning is quite horrible? Well, clearly you haven’t come across hardcore French songs for kids.
Let me count down from light hardcore to devil, so you can quit the moment you become uncomfortable. Let’s go.
5. Alouette (A Lark)
Catchy tune, cute little bird. Take his feathers one by one until he’s bold! (lyrics and translation)
4. Une Souris Verte (a Green Mouse)
We love this song! It was the first French rhyme we got to know. I still sing it silently from time to time. What’s the hardcore factor? Well, unless you’re pro dipping mice in the hot water and oil to change them into snails, you should get it. (lyrics and translation)
3. Malbrough s’en va-t-en guerre (Mr. Malbrough)
Cruelty against the animals is not the only value French children learn from rhymes. The truths of life are also passed in early childhood. Mr. Malbrough went out on a war, his wife was waiting and waiting until a messenger came to tell her Mr Malbrough was killed and buried. Not a shadow of a happy end. (lyrics and translation)
2. Il etait une bergere (there was once a shepherdess)
The little shepherdess kills a cat for dipping a chin in her milk. She needs to confess in the church. What’s her penance? Making out with a priest. (lyrics and translation)
Are you ready for the last one?
1. La legend de Saint Nicolas
If watching thrillers makes you sleep deprived for several days, don’t read further. Quit now. The song I’m about to tell you about is THE way to warn your kids about strangers danger.
Kids were playing in the fields, got lost in the evening and asked a butcher for a shelter. Of course he let them in, and immediately killed them all and cut into pieces and put into barrels. But this time there is a happy end! Saint Nicolas came 7 years later, saved the children and chased the butcher away. (lyrics and translation)
That’s just 5. Believe me, there’s more. Surprisingly, the French are not the nation of serial killers, animal murderers, safety obsessed and emotionally crooked weirdos. How come?!