Why do we need mommy friends? Why do we need to have few very close but meet whole lot more? Who do we need exactly?
We need someone who will always understand, who will always approve. But we also need a mum friend, who will shake her head and disapprove. We need to meet a totally chaotic, disorganized mum. We need to meet a mum who knows a lot. In that new friend circle, we need a mum who is organized, a master of a daily routine. We need friends who eat crap and mum’s who should obtain a degree in eco-organic baby gear. We need them all. We need a cio friend and a co-sleeping mum friend. We need to know a mum who formula feeds from early on and a mum who breastfeeds a 3 year old. You will need a mum who knew nothing about kids and you need to know that mum who can cite research studies in the middle of the night. We need to meet with a mum who disciplines and a mum who lets her bundle-of-joy do whatever. A mum who lets her kid watch TV all day and a mum whose 2 year old has never seen a screen. We need a mum-friend who’s fixated on intellectual development and a mum who believes in movement more than in brain, and another one who will convince us that both are equally important. We need a mum who can DIY magic and a mum who knows every answer to introducing solids. We need a working mum and a SAHM and a WAHM. We should welcome in our entourage a doubtless mum and a mum full of doubts. A mum who doesn’t want number two and a mum expecting her third.
Embrace them all!
They are all equally great mothers!
You will love them and hate them, depending on the day, weather and phase of your cycle but you will cherish knowing them, need them and laugh with them more than you can imagine.
We need to know each other. None of us has all the answers, whereas each one of us has one element of the puzzle. You may think you have it all figured it out but one conversation with a friend may open your eyes and widen your horizon to different options.
Meeting all different types of mum will quickly teach you to respect mothers, not to judge mothers. Never. (Unless they are really harming they kids but would such a mum be your friend in the first place?).
So, if you’re a mum to be or a fresh mum and you still believe your single or childless friends will be enough – reconsider. You will have hundreds of questions, thousand of doubts (no matter how assured you feel now) and countless moments in which only a mother will be able to understand.
Let’s embrace diversity in mothersland!